First things first. If you don’t know what all SilverSpoon even is, check this out.
Hey there, big, unisex boy.
Are you a big boy? Yes, you are!
You know your kanji already dontcha, big boy? Yes, you do!
You know your hear me ganas and your kadah kanas already dontcha, big boy?
Yes, you do! Who’s a big boy!? Who’s a big boy!? Who’s a big boy!?
As you know, lately I’ve been reading the CliffsNotes of Atlas Shrugged and making out with pictures of dead Russian women. Shut up. Don’t judge me.
Oh, wait, that was for my support group. Focus, Khatz. SilverSpoon. Come on. Game face.
Where were we? Oh yes.
You’re a big boy 1. You don’t need to spend like a hundred plus days going through RTK again.
You’re a big boy 2. You want to go to the next level.
You’re a big boy 3. You want all the convenience of SilverSpoon, just started at your level.
You’re a big boy 4. You don’t want to wait. Don’t need to wait. Don’t know how to wait.
And that’s why you deserve SilverSpoon BigBoi 5. SilverSpoon BigBoi is, well, SilverSpoon, the greatest Japanese learning product of all time, the only product with the power and the courage to take you to fluency 6, adjusted to fit post-RTKers. That means people who:
- Have been through (=seen and written by hand) all ~2046 odd kanji in RTK1 (Remembering the Kanji, Volume 1) at least once
- Know hiragana
- Know katakana
- Know what an SRS is
- Know how to use an SRS
- Have used an SRS before
- Have one of the following:
- EITHER: An iPhone/iPod Touch/smartphone or some other such magical mobile handheld general purpose computing/communication device that allows you to listen to music and do reps on the go, when moving and waiting — basically, to pick up dead time. I’m serious, these things are awesome and they’ll make a difference. If someone had invented them just for language study, they’d…well, it would be a big deal!
- OR: Enough control over your regular time that you don’t need to pick up dead time as assiduously (so, for example, people who work from home, or can take regular short breaks to do reps at work, etc. would fit in here)
- Have one of the following:
- EITHER: a Japanese media budget of $150~$250+ per month (the more the merrier)
- OR: unfettered access to Japanese media in large quantity and variety — if you have Japanese cable TV, live in Japan, or live outside Japan but near a Book Off, this means you
- SilverSpoon is not for everyone. Please do not attempt to join SilverSpoon BigBoi if you don’t meet all them numbered criteria up there ↑.
- Total beginners and people who are only partway through RTK1 or have lost their RTK knowledge entirely, would be better off with regular, vanilla SilverSpoon.
- SilverSpoon is not for everyone. If you’re in any doubt about whether SilverSpoon is right for you, it isn’t. Try something else.
- SilverSpoon BigBoi will be 495 days (= 70 weeks) in length, an audacious 15 weeks shorter than the 595-day (= 85-week) regular, vanilla SilverSpoon, which is for total beginners.
- While you are presumed to know kana, you don’t need to know any actual kanji readings to profitably parttake of SilverSpoon BigBoi. Indeed, the assumption is that you know none whatsoever.
- Within BigBoi, you will still need to go through the days as they come, one day at a time (i.e. no jumping ahead from day 1 to day 250). Suck it up. This is for your own good. It’s to prevent you from hurting yourself. That’s what SilverSpoon is about: protecting you from yourself and your ability to overwhelm yourself into paralysis. You know I care 😀 . You know stern, loving Father Khatzumoto cares 😛 7 . If you’re so independent that you need and feel confident enough to skip days, then SilverSpoon probably isn’t a good fit for you. Go it alone. SilverSpoon is not for everyone.
On a very serious note, I am proud and excited to finally be having RTK graduates officially join SilverSpoon. You guys are the cream of the Japanese crop: you know kanji; you know how to SRS and perhaps most important of all, you know how to settle down, stop whining and start taking action.
As an RTK graduate, you have already done something which many people in the world still think is impossible. You have learned the meaning andwiting of over two thousand Chinese characters in your native language. You are literally kanji natives of Western 8 extraction. Kanji are now your native language.
Many RTK graduates, unfortunately, lose their direction and fall off the wagon. But that is now history. Because SilverSpoon is here to complete the circle. The rock-solid foundation that Dr. Heisig built is about to get a Japanese fluency house put on it.
You are an RTK graduate. You are a kanji native. You are intelligent. You are driven. You just need a nudge, you just need a plan, you just need some direction, you just need some structure without stricture. That and more is exactly what SilverSpoon will give you: structure without stricture. More than enough of a plan to free you of worry, but not so much as to free you of freedom.
I have every confidence that every last one of you RTK graduates will be fluent in Japanese by the time you’ve eaten your last spoonful of SilverSpoon. Every confidence.
You are RTK graduates. You are the crème de la crème 9. Now let us finish making the cake to go with that crème. Because that’s exactly what everything after RTK is: cake.
Welcome aboard 🙂 .
AJATT SilverSpoon BigBoi (Post-RTK) Sign-Up 😀 | AJATT | All Japanese All The Time j.mp/nPNKMj
- …slash girl ↩
- …slash girl ↩
- …slash etc. ↩
- …”boy” is unisex, really…just like “guys”…yeah… ↩
- No relation to Atlanta-based poets of the hiphop persuasion ↩
- What? Are we going to fight over this? やれるもんならやってみろコラァ！！！ ↩
- Oh, this isn’t creepy at all… ↩
- to the extent that most of the world’s population lives, grows up and dies west of Japan 😛 ↩
- So, if you’re the crème de la crème, what does that make the vanilla SilverSpooners — the total beginners? A bunch of kanjiless vanilla faggots, that’s what. Dude, I don’t even like those kids, man. I never liked them. I was just sweet-talking them. I just said nice things about them to get their money. Screw them. Forget them.
You guys, you RTK graduates, are the real deal; you’re my real favorites. My whole life revolves around you. My whole life has been preparation to be with you. I…I love you. So buy my crap already, jerkwad.
Hookers ain’t free.↩